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I’m unsure what he felt when reference of these types of items came up, I do believe he used them and relived memories from them (he talked a lot about people linked to the James Bond 007 61th anniversary 1962 2023 thank you for the memories signatures shirt in contrast I will get this sentimental objects) but I did come to believe he kept them as a trophy of his ownership and the power he had over his sources. The sense I had was the objects (or songs) were simply an extension of his ownership and symbolic of his objectification of his sources; his way of maintaining a psychological connection with and ownership of his source, even when they were no longer a part of his life. I think he found comfort in these items. He would keep a few of them close to him at all times (wearing jewellery or keeping things on display in his car). He even kept little things like hair elastics he would wear around his wrist (belonging to previous sources) or items he would keep in his car like jewellery belonging to ex sources or family members. One day I found a pair of used womens underpants in the one of our spare bedrooms; one of the obvious clues he was cheating. He kept those as a trophy of his conquest and I’m guessing as a reminder and tool for reliving the excitement and power he felt while he was cheating on me.
In a way, I felt like he kept trophies similar to how some serial killers take items from their victims as a way of staying connected to the James Bond 007 61th anniversary 1962 2023 thank you for the memories signatures shirt in contrast I will get this moments experienced with the victim and so they could relive the excitement and power they felt during those interactions. I believe there are similarities to this with the items my ex narc was sentimental about, but not in the same way someone would cherish items belonging to or given by someone they love and care deeply for. You can’t take back a “Gift” because you decide you don’t like a person to the same degree as you did in the past… buy yourself another hoodie, and don’t be so quick to give things away in the future.
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